The first lines of a novel are first impressions.
There are hundreds upon hundreds of books out there. What sets yours apart from others? There are many answers to this question. Three-dimensional characters. A vivid, engaging world. Strong, authentic voice. Sure, those things do, but sometimes, it’s the first paragraph, the first sentence that decides whether someone wants to continue reading to see all the great nuances underneath. If you’re submitting to an agent or publishing house, the importance of the first line gets tripled.
First lines are crucial to the overall success of the story, the foundation upon which the reader’s interest is built. This hook is even more important when people are scanning the book to see if they want to buy it. Many people read the blurb, read the first couple lines, scan a couple random pages, and then make their decision.
Great first lines can draw you in and before you know it, it’s 4 o’clock in the morning, and you don’t know where the time has gone. We’ve all been there, and we all want that for our books. So, how do you craft that perfect first line/paragraph?
Here are some tips:
Open with something unusual that draws the reader’s attention.
Put your character in unusual situations and see what unfolds. Freak snowstorm in July? Cool. Your character is driving across town to meet with his twin who was separated at birth. Awesome.
Start with motion.
Have your characters go somewhere new, somewhere old. Have a car hit your main character, and the resulting injuries change their life forever. Maybe a delayed airplane causes a chain of events that somehow leads to them meeting their biological mother, when they never thought they’d find her.
Start with action.
Have your characters in the middle of doing something. Asking for a promotion they need to stay in their home. Robbing a bank with cops surrounding the building. Hunting a bounty armed to the teeth with knives and guns. Etc. Clearly define the stakes and what it means if they fail.
Explicitly tell us what’s happening.
Situate the reader in story and tell them the context of what’s happening. The first lines that has stuck with me the most is from Passion Unleashed by Larissa Ione, even though I read it close to a decade ago.
“There were three things Wraith did well: hunt, fight, and fuck. He was going to do all three tonight. In exactly that order.”
Immediately, we’re thrown into this world and we have a good idea of what’s happening. Immediately, we can draw our own inferences about who Wraith is as a character. Wraith does exactly as he says: he hunts down the bad guy and has an intense fight, but he doesn’t get the sex until later, unfortunately for him.
Create an emotional response in the reader.
It can be whatever emotion that suits your needs. Anger from having a car towed because you’re going to be late to work and possibly fired. Sadness from having a loved one pass after a long struggle with cancer. Joy at finally mustering up the courage to go outside if your character is agoraphobic.
Use shorter sentences.
As a reader, I find myself drawn to shorter first lines and first paragraphs. Shorter, direct sentences drive the story along at a brisk pace instead of dragging us along slowly and carefully.
Set the right tone or mood.
For this, I think of J. K. Rowling’s The Sorcerer’s Stone. “Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much.”
In this first sentence, Mr. and Mrs. Dursley are very adamant about their normalcy, which then leads to the idea that maybe they’re not as normal as they’d like people to believe. It goes on to describe them in an almost comical way before getting into the usualness of them. Rowling effectively sets the mood for the entire novel in that one sentence.
Let your voice shine through.
Some of the best opening lines are heavy with the author’s voice. Your voice, after all, is what ultimately sets you apart from other writers. Some voices are similar, but no one can replicate your voice perfectly. Starting off with a clear indication of your voice might intrigue the reader to keep reading. I tend to like more sardonic, dark voices, and when I see that early on, it hooks me quickly.
Dropping the f-bomb in the first sentence of Passion Unleashed hooked me, I won’t lie.
Some things to avoid.
Don’t have your character waking up.
It doesn’t matter how it’s done, whether it’s an alarm, someone shaking them awake, the birds or the sun, on their own, etc.It’s cliché and boring. It’s been played out far too many times. I immediately put a book down if it starts with the character waking up. To me, it screams amateur, and I don’t want to waste my time or money.
Start with a dream.
If you start with a scene, no matter how amazing and interesting, and then you reveal it was all a dream, there’s a 9/10 chance I will hate you. This enrages readers and for good reason. Essentially, nothing they just read matters. Nothing. Even if you think it’s clever foreshadowing, your readers have no way of knowing that, and it just seems pointless. It feels like deception in a way, and no one wants that.
Open with dialogue.
It seems like a good idea, using a provocative or funny piece of dialogue to catch the reader’s attention. The problem is, we know nothing about the characters yet. We don’t know who’s speaking, who they’re speaking to, or what the overall context of the conversation is. Dialogue, when done properly, should be effortless, and the reader should never be left wondering who’s speaking.
If you’re set on using dialogue as an opener, make sure we know who’s speaking, who they’re speaking to, and why. All that needs to happen within that first sentence.
Introduce too many characters.
This one applies to not only the first lines but the first page or two as well. No one likes to be bombarded with information right off the bat. It’s overwhelming and sometimes difficult to keep straight.
Start with irrelevant information.
Remember, first impressions matter, so why would you want to fill that limited space with stuff that doesn’t matter? You want your best work to be showcased.
Use excessive descriptions.
It’s always a good idea to situate a new scene, but excessive descriptions in the first sentence or paragraph weighs down the narrative and sometimes brings it to a screeching halt—all within the first line(s).
Open with the backstory.
As with introducing too many characters, word vomiting the whole backstory for your character or world can be overwhelming and confusing. Plus, it gives everything away too quickly. The only exception is having a prologue with information that’s needed to understand the current narrative. When done smartly with a clear purpose, backstories in prologues can be effective.
Think of opening lines that hooked you immediately. They can often give you ideas for your own manuscript. There is no trick rule to hooking readers. Just experiment with what works for you and your story.
Do you have any tips for first lines?
If you missed it, check out last week’s blog on Vivid, Realistic Descriptions in Narratives. Check back next week for the next blog post. Consider subscribing so you never miss a post.
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