Writing dialogue can feel like pulling teeth. We’ve all been there. In fact, many writers consider it to be the hardest part of writing. Having choppy, unrealistic, or just cringe-worthy dialogue can ruin a story. As a reader, I’ve put books down before because the dialogue threw me off and took me out of the story too much, which is a shame because the stories had potential.
In this blog, I’d like to about talk about the purpose of dialogue, how to create realistic dialogue, and briefly mention eye dialect, but first, let’s start with the basics: dialogue tags and how to properly format them.
Dialogue tags.
What is a dialogue tag? A dialogue tag is the verb/phrase used before, in between, or after a character has spoken. Said. Asked. Replied. Yelled. The list goes on and on. It indicates that someone has said something aloud.
Said and asked are always good options to fall back on. Simple, nondescript, classic. Essentially, dialogue tags should be invisible. By this, I mean that our conscious mind shouldn’t pause over them. When we use too many various ones, our minds tend to pause on them because it becomes distracting.
This isn’t to say you should never vary from said and asked. In fact, when used thoughtfully, variations can be very effective and can make more of an impact on what’s being said due to the connotation. Whispered can be stronger than said softly. Snapped implies anger or irritation without even needing to state it.
Each word in writing needs to be chosen deliberately in a smart way.
What not to use as dialogue tags:
I see these a lot. Sigh. Shrug. Nod.
“I have to go home tomorrow,” she sighed. You can’t sigh words or shrug words or nod words. It’s not possible. Consider the action and if it’s actually possible to do.
Formatting dialogue.
Formatting dialogue is very simple once you understand the basic formula.
“Hello,” he said.
Note: the comma always goes on the inside of the parentheses and unless the speaker is a proper noun (like Jack or Jill), the pronoun (he) is not capitalized.
Here are three ways to express the same sentence:
He looked me in the eye and said clearly, “No. I’m not going.”
“No. I’m not going,” he said clearly, looking me in the eye.
“No,” he said clearly, looking me in the eye. “I’m not going.”
In this last example, note the period after eye. If the dialogue was interrupted, there would be a comma because the thought isn’t complete. For example:
“How,” he yanked at the nail with no luck, “do I get this thing out?”
The Purpose of Dialogue.
Dialogue serves a larger purpose than two (or more) people having a conversation. Duh! Dialogue has three main purposes: character development, creating mood/tension, and advancing the plot.
Character development.
We can learn a lot about a character by how they speak and what they say. Motivation and desires. How they think and feel.
Creating mood/tension.
Conversations between characters and how each character reacts influence the mood. Sadness. Anger. Dialogue can escalate drama and tension.
Advance the plot.
Dialogue is a good tool to inform readers of plot points—take, for example, fantasy novels and how characters often explain fantastical elements in dialogue. Dialogue could spur a character into action or change a character’s mind.
If dialogue doesn’t do one of those three, then it’s not necessary.
Crafting Realistic Dialogue.
Fiction is supposed to mimic real life or what real life would be like in a certain situation (will do a blog on this topic sometime, as the idea fascinates me). Here are some tips on crafting realistic dialogue that sounds natural and satisfies one of the three requirements mentioned above.
Make the dialogue appropriate to the setting.
In a story set in an alternate reality following the life of pirates, characters probably aren’t going to use slang popular today. It’s going to feel out of place and probably a little cringy.
Be realistic but not too realistic.
Your characters shouldn’t speak perfectly. Think about how you talk with your friends. It’s fluid. It ebbs and flows. You want to capture that. However, natural speech can be messy and confusing sometimes. Don’t put in every “umm.”
Don’t force dialogue.
If you force it, it’ll sound forced, and you don’t want that. If you can’t find a way to say something, maybe your character doesn’t want to say it.
Avoid small talk.
Small talk is boring, and it doesn’t move the plot forward. Jump right into the main purpose of the conversation.
Avoid big long chunks of dialogue without interruptions.
Chunks of speech-like dialogue are clunky and hard to read visually. Giving information through dialogue is a useful tool, but have your character doing something that provides a little break in the paragraph. Have them fold laundry or run their hands through their hair, both of which add another level of realism. While being clunky, speech-like dialogue also feels one-sided, so another trick is to have another character respond, even if it’s a simple statement or question to prompt the speaker.
Use contractions.
If the story is set in present day, it makes me pause when characters don’t use contractions. It’s a very natural element of speech. Prose isn’t an essay where you need to be proper and formal.
Don’t put the story into the dialogue.
Would you address your sister as big sister? Probably not. Don’t do it for the sake of explaining who she is. If someone knows the information, don’t state it for the sake of the reader. Address it in the narrative. Don’t do the typical bad guy giving his spew. Nothing makes me cringe harder.
Choose informal words.
Instead of assist, use help. Instead of ascertain, use learn.
Let your characters be unique.
No two characters should sound the same in tone and voice. Let them be unique in how they speak. Maybe one character is short and to the point, very deliberate in their words. Maybe another uses flowery language. Maybe another says “dude” a lot. A reader should automatically be able to tell who’s speaking even without dialogue tags.
Consider who the character is speaking to.
A character is probably going to talk to his mother differently than he talks to his best friend. This adds depth to the character and their relationships. Just make sure to be consistent with their character.
Eye Dialect.
Eye dialect is the use of non-standardized spelling to bring attention to pronunciation by indicating an accent or particular dialect. Unless it’s used smartly, it can be distracting. With eye dialect, it’s hard to find a good balance. I’m not advocating for or against eye dialect, merely expressing my interest in it.
The term was first coined by George P. Krapp in 1925 in his The English Language in America. He said eye dialect was “one of the eyes, not of the ear.” Since then, many famous authors have used eye dialect in their prose, including Maya Angelou, Mark Twain, John Steinbeck, and Charles Dickens (who may have used it more than any other prominent author).
In large chunks, eye dialect is hard to read. Your brain has to actively think about what’s being said, and reading should be easy. I firmly believe that eye dialect should not be used in the narrative. If you use it, only use it in dialogue.
The best example I have to explain it while also showcasing how it’s done brilliantly is J. K. Rowling because I’m a total Potterhead. I’ve read the series at least a dozen times, and I absolutely adore the story for many reasons. J. K. Rowling does a lot of things well. Rowling only uses eye dialect in dialogue, namely through Hagrid, Fleur, and Viktor’s speech.
In Goblet of Fire, Fleur criticizes the decorations at Hogwarts:
“Zis is nothing,” she said dismissively, looking around at the sparkling walls of the Great Hall. “At ze Palace of Beauxbatons, we ‘ave ice sculptures all around ze dining chambers at Creestmas Zey do not melt, of course….”
So, the words are spelled like they sound coming from her foreign tongue, as she’s French and English is not her first language. Zis = this. Ze = the. ‘ave = have. And so forth. Similarly, Viktor Krum’s speech is also influenced by him being Bulgarian and not speaking English as a first language. Vell = well. Haff = have.
The biggest example of eye dialect in HP is Hagrid, who I always thought was an interesting and authentic character. From The Sorcerer’s Stone when Hagrid is giving Harry his birthday cake:
“Anyway—Harry,” said the giant, turning his back on the Dursleys, “a very happy birthday to yeh. Got summat fer yeh here—I mighta sat on it at some point, but it’ll taste all right.”
Of course, yeh = you. Summat = something. Fer = for.
One could argue eye dialect can make a character seem uneducated or stupid. As in the case with Hagrid, the eye dialect makes him seem uneducated, but I think it largely works for his character. He’s not stupid by any means, and I don’t believe it makes him appear as such. Eye dialect can have a negative effect on some characters.
My opinion: Merely telling a reader about how a character pronounces something or that a character has an accent is usually enough, and eye dialect isn’t necessary. I wouldn’t personally use it in my own writing, but I do find it interesting.
I hope you’ve taken something away from this blog post. Leave your comments below! What are your tips for realistic dialogue? How do you feel about eye dialect?
Check back next week for the next blog post! Click here to read last week’s about the interrobang. Make sure to subscribe to never miss a post.
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